I had a pen and paper for so long. I wrote every day. I drew every day. I got these contraptions that dilute the essence.
I am making excuses for not writing. The system I use was crashing. I did not know how to fix it. I need to break through on how to get caught up.
I used to be able to drop pictures. Music. Poem down in a morning.
Let’s see where I am at.
The notes scrubbed clean my ears with familiar melodies that have beat the same before on my ear drum. I passed the same blocks on my way to the depths of the trains moving forward in heat that vibrates the underworld. You leave the last sounds of birds before you descend down those stairs.
I thought to myself, there is so much I want to say today. There is so much I have bouncing from one synapse to another. There is so much out of my control, but I could always write. I could always calm the obtuse in front of me by focusing on a point. Then explaining it. However I felt that day there is a need to fill this canvas with some black.
The music makes those memories come alive. I hear moments in my head that ask for perception to reconcile with current experiences. My mind journeys in an out of current to past. The day hits and in a moment I am not in it. Then the circumstances present a force to focus in it. My instincts overpower my daily journey.
I sign some papers, I make calls, I make events surge forward and then free this climb to halt.
People I do not know, floors and surroundings I have not seen, then turn to environments with others I have already been.
In my mind stirs a woman who has spent all her salt of life to her family passes through conversations and takes me distracted through them. I knew her, but an end cut the place I exist now. Why was it a time for something to end that only helped everything she touched. She made it possible for some to continue down this path we all take. Then, she leaves. What choice?
And the talk of familiarities continue to harvest new meetings. The earth still spins and there is no stopping the momentum.
Enter the love into a room, the love and giving love I never felt possible. Shift to happiness of journeys that I can experience with this love. Another shift.
Check the time, it is time to move to the next step of the day.
So I write, finish my thought and now there is another event in the day to learn. To sanctify an existence.
While this is about time I wander to the next place. I would like to think I am the expression, “not all who wander are lost”, but I am wandering from one event to another.
I type in a phone, and I leave behind a message. And all that is said will be here because I chose to write it down. In a place that exists. In this event of explanation you need to take time to absorb how to feel the next day you leave it, but how you will be absorbing to experience what is to come.
In this vessel, life is never easy, but you use it to say what is important. Hopefully I have done so.